Lately my life has changed. From good to bad, from worse to hell. but one thing that has stood out the most to me is all the support I am receiving. My views have changed lately and the way I used to see things I don’t know how I see them anymore. Its hard to determine right from wrong, its hard to know where you put your foot down and where you keep it up. Standing on one leg teeter tottering and waiting till you fall down and everything around you falls too. Lately I have asked myself, is this really my place, should I really say anything at all. It kills me to stand back and watch all the pain all the misery happen. Its also hard to be the cause of all the pain and all the misery. Lately I have stopped and really looked at whats around me and what I thought was the best thing has really turned into something I don’t know. Sometimes its like everything’s normal then I sit down and realize nothing is normal, everything is changed, and normal has gone away. What you believed for so long has vanished and it hurts to think about it. Lately life has changed, Lately lots of things have changed. I have been miserable not wanting to really be around anyone, sitting back taking everything in and telling how I feel to a dog that cant speak, in fear that ill hurt someones feelings, in fear that ill ruin someones disguise, in fear or torturing the person that’s been tortured enough. Keeping my mouth closed, hoping the worse goes away and the good starts coming, hoping they find their way and this nightmare leaves me. Lately I have learned what friends are their and what friends aren’t. I have learned who cares and who doesn’t. Who listens and hugs, who doesn’t ask why I am crying but just gives me a hug and says it will be fine. There are things in this world I wont understand, There will be people in this world that I wont understand and There will be actions people do in this world that I will just never understand. Actions that hurts others. Actions that kills feelings. and Lies that are left untold. The deeper the lie the deeper the result, the deeper the cut. In the end, I know who cares and I know who doesn’t. Lately I have realized, Lately I have realized, what pain can really do to someone. What lieing can really do to someone, What mistakes can do to someone, and What telling the truth can really do. Lately I have realized that in high school I picked the right people to surround myself with, even if sometimes I worry if it will ever be the same, they are the same, they don’t make things different they are themselves and they will keep me myself. Lately I have realized the right choices I have made in life and the wrong ones and the ways that I hope one day I will learn to fix them. For now I am content with life, minus the pain, minus the hurt, minus the mistakes of others, I am content. I now know who to focus more my attention too and who to cut from my life completely. Right now I live for myself, not anyone else.
So never be ungrateful for what you have. Never say wish you had a better life, because your life is probably pretty amazing. Always be grateful, always say thank you and please, always smile, and always care. You can never realize how far caring for someone can go in that persons life.